Lately I've been pretty confused. And have felt unproductive. I do my school work, talk to friends, do some reading, and listen to music (my latest music adventure has been the Stooges), but I haven't been doing much myself, especially on my blog. I still love fashion. Yesterday I bought the November issue of Vogue; Natalia Vodianova was so beautiful on the cover, in her shining gold Chanel dress. And when I opened the magazine, the first thing I saw was an image of Karlie Kloss, painted pure white with roses on her head and breast. It dazed me, and brought my heart up from the slightly blah place it has been in lately. Dazed is my favorite place to be; something special, significant, poignant, whatever, strikes you, and for a few moments in time, its just you and that something (the Stones, David Bowie, Karlie *yes, first name basis*). But I also feel unsure. Fashion will always be a part of me, but I feel my interests straying occasionally.
Music became a more important part of my life this past summer. I saw a documentary about Ed Sullivan, and seeing the Stones perform such amazing music really changed me. I had finally found a missing piece I only distantly knew was gone. Then, I started reading about them and seeing pictures of them, so then I saw who they hung out with (Bowie, Iggy, Lou) and it was an upward spiral from there.
But I don't think music will ever be a career for me. I can't sing (I lip synced my way all through church choir), and writing about it is too hard. You don't want to worship these people, because 1: they could be a super jerk with a super talent to match, so it would be best to just see their work as work itself, unless you meet them and they give you a flower garland and say some stupid poem that you pretend means something, or 2: no one should be put on a pedestal, and celebrity worship leads to, at the least, acceptance of all their work, good or bad. And I feel like I'm still in the worshipful stage of fandom. In order to be a good music writer, I need to dedicate my life to music (not something I am willing to do) and defend it, which often times means criticizing it (or acting like a stuck up jerk and being the only person not dancing in the arena). How could I possibly break it to Mick that *gasp* ''Dancing in The Street'' was kind of campy? Or did they mean to be that way?
I also started writing poetry, about lost rock stars, myself, and other people I see laying on my neighborhood high school's football field. And I write about dresses and clothes, the way you can get so lost in them, and how that makes them awesome. This essay or whatever it is is starting to sound confusing and convoluted, but I guess that shows how I feel right now. I don't know exactly what I want to do with my life, or even my day. I just know it will be something creative, stylish, and inevitably something ''rock'n'roll'' related. I'll probably be a writer of some sort. Whatever.
Anywaysie daisie, heres a list of things I really recommend, am inspired by, and have been up to:
1.) Lorde's new video:
2.) Basically anything Rolling Stones/Stooges/Led Zeppelin related
3.) And I started knitting this tank top (and yeah, it is kind of weird to end a list at four, but WHATEVER, DUDETTE):
This is the back of my tanktop (starring my cute little toesies)
Here is the front in progress:
Selfie with my precious Bowie book; so, so many valuable life lessons: